I hope I'm never the same.

May is my month. Between anniversary, Mother's Day and my birthday, I get a present almost every week. Poor Hub. He does a really good job of spoiling me. He had been out of town all last week and then came home with Corinthian Chimes (that I had hinted for at Mother's Day and thought he had forgotten) and a freshwater pearl bracelet that we had seen together at a local jewelry store. The chimes have such a rich, deep, perfect tone and I love them on my back patio.

Even better though, the man did for me what I truly wanted. I felt so very drawn to go to Joplin, MO and see if we could be of help. Getting the news that a friend of ours who now lives there was trapped in the Wal-Mart and missing for several hours, it just made it so personal. Not sure what to do or expect, we loaded up an SUV with 32 cases of water and headed out early Saturday morning. Poor Hub. It's a 4-1/2 hour drive and he had just driven back on Friday afternoon from a 7 hour trip in the same direction. What a guy!

We got there and went to our friend's church where there was a hub of activity. People and trucks were pulling in from all over the country. The people in Tuscaloosa, AL, who had just been through a similar situation, sent truck with things as well. People of all ages were drawn there to help in all kinds of ways. There was one man there that clearly had been a victim of a severe stroke. He was passing out waters and shuffling big trash cans back and forth relentlessly. I spent most of that day inside the church sorting through clothing and supplies. Hub was outside unloading trucks and helping to set up tents. Crews with chain saws were going out from place to place to cut trees so that they could be moved. Other crews went out to help people gather what they could salvage from their homes and to offer food, supplies and comfort. Another crew kept fresh food prepared for all the volunteers and survivors. The large church building was full of makeshift bedding and many people who had lost their homes were staying there along with the volunteers. We had brought bedding and had actually planned to just sleep in the back of the SUV. Kind of romantic, I had thought beforehand, but after a long day of work and sweating, we were happy to go home with a couple we had been working with when they offered us a shower and a place with A/C to sleep.

When we first drove into town, our GPS took us a bit around the outskirts of town so we saw very little destruction. Hub had gone into town with a guy to pick up more tents. He came back very somber just saying "You won't believe it!". He drove me through on the way to the home of our hosts for the night. He was right. It as all very apocolyptic. I expected to see Bruce Willis coming out from behind somewhere. It struck me how mostly void everything was of color. The pictures do not do it justice. Everything was in bits and mangled. Paint was pulled off of most things and trees were stripped of bark. You would be looking at something and realize it was a car. No, two or three cars tangled together. People were sitting on piles around their place to protect it from looters. (Our friend said while she was crawling out from Wal-Mart, that there were already people looting the store.) Everyone looked somber and many still disoriented. I looked at it in unbelief. I actually felt a bit guilty of taking pictures of their nightmare. People had literally been sucked out of the sunroofs of their cars while their seatbelts were still belted. I can't comprehend a force like that.

But I also saw a powerful resilience in people. There were several American flags hung on to pieces of metal and bare branches. On one torn house we saw, someone had spraypainted "We will be okay." We saw other relief centers scattered throughout the city. Lots of people in each of them. On Sunday, Obama came to town. We saw lines of people on the streets waving flags and holding signs that read "God loves Joplin" and "Joplin will rise". It was great for the President to come and acknowledge and comfort these people. Someone made the comment though that so many are so deep in the devastation, that they may not even get the word that he would be there. The devastated area is wide and they are working in from the perimeter to clear. You can barely get to the center areas. That will probably explain for some lost people.

On another note, the President's visit halted most of the work for the day until he had left. Curfew had been set from 9 p.m. until 9 a.m. so no one could even get in the areas in the morning before he arrived due to security. That wasn't good. Many, many people were able to be there because it was a holiday weekend. Hated to lose most of a day and all of the workers that had to leave. Bush was criticized severely for flying over New Orleans as to not interfere with the work. Not sure what the answer is but I guess Presidents just can't win this one.

Anyway, I feel changed a bit by what I saw and experienced. The areas around Joplin are truly beautiful. It did make me note the comparison between the natural beauty that God had created and the man-made creations that was crushed, crumpled, shattered and devoid of color. Our hosts said that the tornado was heading directly toward their beautiful property and then abruptly turned a different way. Their front yards had been cleared that day by teenagers of about 9 leaf bags of little pieces. They found a few personal effects from unknown homes. A few snapshots. I noticed out a back window where it had not been touched. Little pieces and shreds of gray everywhere. There was a piece of sheet metal wrapped around a branch high in a tree. Will probably have to stay there. Looked like a pink top laying on the ground. Mostly, though pieces not 2"x 2".

What a mighty God we worship. People asked "Where was God?" I saw him everywhere. In the power of destruction and in the hands, hearts and faces of people there to help other people. There are lots of stories of sacrifice, heroism, miracles, etc. Lots of hugs and lots of shared tears. That's where God was. Make no mistake about it.

Later.

What does a diploma, a roller derby and a fire all have in common?

weekend (noun) Any two-day period given regularly as a weekly rest period from one's work.

RIGHT! It can be a whole lot of work to get that rest thing. And then there is the whole self-imposed stress thing, too. But sometimes, it is so worth it.

Hub's flight back from Georgia the night before was really delayed due to bad weather. He didn't get home after 1 a.m. This meant that we had to go back to the airport Friday morning to pick up the mini-van we rented. We all started out tired and ended up not leaving until after noon. It rained all the way. We went through two significant hail storms and at one point we were under tornado warnings. One problem; weather warnings are issued by counties. Who knows counties in a different state? I'm just learning the county names for the ones around us. We blindly kept going; praying all the way. Ignorance can be bliss, I say. We passed through all kinds of flooding due to the Mississippi River, etc. We told our family that we literally came through "hail and high water" to get there.

Love, love, love being with this family. Lots to celebrate. Much loved niece graduating from college; another niece received her master's degree; two engagements; one adorable grand-niece to meet and love on, our military hero nephew home for a visit after three years. Good stuff. Plus this is a really fun group. Our weekend at the lake was cold, with rain or drizzle the whole weekend. We still had a blast.

I can now say that I now have been to a roller derby. If you have never been, it is a total hoot. Our niece's league has bouts to raise money for charity. This week was for Susan G. Comen. My sweet, gorgeous niece becomes an animal on the track. Her team (Buxom Babes) beat the other team (Tiny Tatas) and she was awarded the MVP award. Greatness! These girls are tough. Wow! What a fun time. Never knew that could be so much fun.

As always, my klutz-side was present and reared its ugly head. We were leaving for the roller derby and I had my reading glasses on trying to run an update on my phone. (Stupid!!!) I "thought" that I knew where I was and that the sidewalk made a right angle. Forgot that there was also a significant step down. I did a nose dive out of my slide sandals onto the sidewalk. I finally sat up and had to stay there as I was seeing stars. I was hurt; was mad at myself, and was dirty and wet. My elbow had a big strawberry and was already bruising and swelling. My ribs are bruised and everything hurts. Don't think that I broke anything, but I certainly did feel like a fossil. I'm still stiff and sore, so I have the constant pain to remind me. My family has had a field day with the jokes.

"The Girlfriend" has been on best, well maybe better, behavior lately. That was totally all over this weekend. Not sure if she is on a perpetual, permanent, painful period or what. She was snippy, snappy, snoopy, and sour. (Brought to you by the letters "P" and "S".) Maybe she is actually going to move out on June 1 so she figures she can let it all hang out. She still is swaddling up to Hub a little. Doesn't want to break it off with "sugar daddy" just yet. Hub and I had a talk about it and how inappropriate it was. He actually seemed to have finally noticed and said that he understood my feelings. He is ready for a "BUH-BYE" as well. #2 caught her discussing me with new-niece-in-law-to-be. Before we got in the car to come back, I tried to take her aside to have a private conversation. It was just like talking to a little child who knows that they are in trouble. Me: "Can we talk?" Girl: "Why-y-y-y-y? I don't wa-a-a-ant to-o-o-o." Seriously? She finally came out and I asked her what was up. She said that she didn't want to talk but that changes would have to be made. I'm all over that! Anyway, since she wasn't going to talk, I just told her that she needed to treat us all a little nicer and that badmouthing to members of our family was not cool. Anyway, she was pissy to everyone in the car all the way home including #1 and said that she was sick and throwing up. I made the same pit stops and didn't see anything like that. She did run in when we stopped for fast food and ordered herself chicken, fries and a chocolate shake. Then last night, we stopped at Subway and she had a foot-long sandwich! Still playing the sick card. Stick a fork in me. I'm DONE!

Any who, don't want to leave this as a complete bitch-fest. We did have a good time. Sunday night we had a bonfire by the lake with all the limbs that had come off in the storm. Haven't done that in a very long time. Some made s'mores. I just like to burn some marshmallows. Sat around and talked by the fire until late. Told funny GrandMa and GrandDad stories; kids stories and a few war stories from Afghanistan.

It is so good being with this group. Their dad, my brother-in-law, died a few years ago due to brain cancer. The kids seem to look to Hub as their father figure now. I'm so proud of him for the way he takes that very seriously and tries to be there for them. I know his brother would have done the same if the roles had been different. He was so proud of his family and with good cause. They are doing well; starting families of their own, and life goes on in a beautiful fashion. Well done, Dad.

Later.

Ode to Twenty Eight Years

Twenty-eight years ago today, I married my forever love. Definitely hasn't be my forever "like" (that man doesn't exist); but he is my forever love. I remember the preacher used scripture from the Book of Ruth within our vows. "Whether thou goest, I will go." I loved it. I thought it was such beautiful scripture. No one told me that Hub really thought I meant it and put that part to the test.

I've been thinking about our past a lot today. It's the kind of thing you do on anniversaries. Everyone seems to be doing number lists these days and I will try to follow suite.

• 1 - Wedding (so far)



• 2 - People (not an option)



• 10 - Relocations



• 8 - Homes bought together



• 1 - Step-Daughter



• 1 - Son-in-law (Now Removed)



• 3 - Surgeries for infertility



• 1 - Pregnancy



• 1 - Miscarriage



• 1 - Failed Adoption



• 2 - Beautiful Boys to fill our lives.



• 6 - Dogs, 1 Cat, 2 Birds and numerous Goldfish (one at a time and all named Dorothy)



• 17 - Years the cat has been with us



• 19 - Years we have been a member of a school PTA/PTO



• 2 - Major job layoff and several career changes



• 9 - Churches that filled our spirits and gave us direction



• 2 - Countries we have visited (we need to do better there)



• 13 - New Cars bought together



• 5 - Cars our son has wrecked



• 8 - Number of high school reunions we have attended together



• 2 - Mothers and 2 Dads that we have lost and miss dearly



• Too many other deaths (1 Brother; 1 Brother-in-Law; 1 Nephew; 1 Grandmother; Many Aunts & Uncles)



• 2 - Beds that have been in our master bedroom



• 5 - Mattress sets



• 1 - Formal Dining Room Suite (only thing that is left from our first house)



• Many, many arguments



• An equal amount of "kiss and make-ups"

And they said it would never last. We fooled them.

Love you, Honey! Shame I don't let you read my blog.

(Don't start on me. I will make him a copy.)

Later.

The Queen's Throne

Please bear with me for a minute while I brag. This chair just came home with me from Craigslist. It's great in front of my dad's desk that Hub just refinished. I finally have my throne!!! Excuse me while I think up some royal decrees.

Later.

Of Princes and Toads?

Did I ever mention that supposedly I am a direct descendant of a European King? I guess that I was so very impressed with this little bit of info that I can't even remember what country. I'm thinking that info and a dollar bill ..........well, it won't even buy you a cup of coffee now days. My sis-in-law has gone OCD on genealogy and did our full family tree back to the 1600's. She came up with that little tidbit on family a while back. I reminded my brother, that I had always told him that I was a princess and needed to be treated like that. Still doesn't work.

SO-O-O-O-O, I did my royal duty today. I got up about 4 a.m. this morning and watched the wedding of William & Kate. I'm such a sucker for a good romance and a good celebration. Like so many of us that watched Charles & Di and all of the craziness that happened, I feel a little protective of Prince William. (Boy, does that sound sick.) Anyway, I still see those sweet boys crying over the loss of their mum and I just want to put my arm around them. Kate seems like a great girl and looks like a perfect match. It is so nice to see someone with some substance do things in that family. As far as a bride, I thought she look breathtaking and carried herself so amazingly. It was a beautiful wedding filled with many ugly and strange hats. I did not wear one as I did not have one that matched my PJ's. My grandmother was a hat designer in San Francisco forever ago. I don't know if she is rolling in her grave or loving them. I thought many of them showed a lack of taste. (Did they look in the mirror?) The women could wear those hats as birds in the Lion King. But don't forget Pippa Middleton! She looked beautiful, too. I want to look like her when I grow up.

Now about the toads.....there is nothing like a toad to bring you back down to reality. I always thought that Texas had strange names for towns. Arkansas is right up there with Texas. When we were looking for a home, I told Hub that I refused to live in a town called Pickle Gap, Lost Corner, Birdtown, or my personal favorite......Toad Suck. Isn't that lovely? Well, guess what started today....Toad Suck Daze. Evidently, it is a pretty big festival around here. On the news today, they said it was BYOT: Bring Your Own Toad. Guess that will leave us out. We said last year that we would make sure to catch it this year. They have several bands playing; crafts; shopping and good food. Tonight Chris Allen was suppose to play. (He won American Idol a couple of years ago and is from this area.)

So if your day ran the spectrum from royalty to toads.... you might be a redneck. Welcome to Arkansas.

Later, Gator.

My Own Personal Little Miracle

Emotional days. Up and down. Least important, yet highly emotional in my world, "All My Children" has been cancelled. What the heck? It's an institution. How many times can Erica Kane really get married? I'm sure she's good for many more "I Do's". How many people can come back from the dead in really crazy ways? We will never know. I'm in mourning.

A quick synopsis of my April would consist of:

• Made it through the tax season. Yea!!


• Made it through the "end of the tax season" party that somehow got to be my baby. That tends to happen because when you get me started on something like that, I tend to run with it. Anyway, good food, great decorations and good fun!


• I am happily unemployed.....for now.


• Hub changed the date for the adult children to move out from May 1 to June 1. No one is surprised that happened after #1's latest altercation. We need to kick him out and keep the girl. At least she is trying and actually seems to be grateful for the help.


• We have spent the last three nights watching the weather channel on TV (whenever the satellite would cooperate) and checking the computer to see where the storms and tornadoes were. The tornado sirens have gone off so much lately that we are not paying them as much attention. Our big gate was broken off the hinges but that is about all the damage we have had. Others have not been so lucky. I don't think I like April in Arkansas. Our home had the roof taken off in a tornado in April 2008, before we owned it. We thought that the past owners were just talking about shingles; but no, it was the whole roof. Tornadoes don't hit the same place twice. Right?


• Is anyone else obsessing over the news of the Royal Wedding? I am planning to get up at 4 a.m. Friday and watch the festivities live. I did that with Diana and Charlie. Gotta love a good Cinderella story. My family will probably find me asleep in the den when they get up at 6:30.


• Went to the doctor today. Not surprised that I need some dreaded tests. Hopefully, this will just be a fire drill. Too much coming up for anything else.

About a week ago, I thought that I had been blessed with my own personal little miracle. I dropped by Lowe's (love home improvement stores) to pick up some assorted home stuff and also a hanging basket. I was by myself; it was a beautiful evening and all was well. Did I mention I WAS BY MYSELF? That's the best part. I was wandering around and enjoying the plants outside when something caught my eye. A baby hummingbird was having a feast on some flowering plants. It wasn't even paying any attention to me. Just going from bloom to bloom having a feast. This little guy was maybe 1-1/2 inches long. I thought "This is too good. I have got to take a picture." Then I realized that I needed to make use of the movie camera on my smart phone. I dropped everything in the street and I am down about a foot from my little bird, just having a great time. How special is this? Then I realize that the camera is not really on. (Note to self: Learn how to use the features of your phone.) By the time I figure out how to start it......my little friend is gone. I do have a bit of film of the camera flitting around the flowers looking for movement. :( I waited around for about 10 minutes stalking the flowers before I went back inside and asked the clerk if she had ever seen a baby hummingbird around. "Security. Crazy person in the garden center!" I told everyone about my encounter. I went home to try to pull up a picture on the internet to show everyone what I had seen. That's when I got the bad news. My baby hummingbird is actually a hummingbird hawk moth. www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8076PK7-r8&NR=1 Evidently, others find them fascinating as well. They are still pretty cool and I guess I will just be happy that it totally delighted me.....whatever it is.

Later. Happy Spring!

Disaster Averted

As I sit here with "egg on my face" and my heart racing, I thought I would share my stupidity. I will preface this with the fact that our oddessey in raising adult children continues. It has been a tough 48 hours. Will this saga never end? Anyway, I'm sleep deprived and frustrated. Not the time, to start another battle. Hub left town for the week this afternoon. He came by my office before he left to sign our taxes and have me sign a joint account check that had come in. We have had some large unexpected expenses so it's one of those times where "Valentines of the green kind" is a really good thing to be going to the bank. So tonight while I was cruising my computer, I decided to check the ol' checking account. No large check deposited. Did he put it in savings? NO! Not a good thing. Now I realize that Hub can become distracted at the drop of a hat. It is probably still in his shirt pocket where he put it. Still walking around with a large endorsed check is not a good thing. Hub had failed to tell me where he was staying tonight. He travels so much that sometimes the details escape us. We've talked a couple of times this afternoon, but I had forgot to ask him then. We generally stay in the same chains so that we can rack up points, so I pulled up the hotel websites to see where he had made reservations. Didn't find anything for tonight but another reservation jumped out at me. One at the Crowne Plaza on the 6th......HERE. He is not suppose to be back until the 8th. THAT S.O.B.! I'm sitting here hurt, mad and thinking of what a stinking time this is to pull something like this. It's going to be a long night. So what am I going to do now. My husband is in another state with a large signed check; has not left an itienary and has reservations at a nice hotel here for tomorrw when he is suppose to be in a different state. This can't be good! I thought about getting in the car and driving tonight where he is. That's 4 hours away and I'm too tired. Should I just show up at the Crowne Plaza tomorrow night and try to catch him? Do I want to catch him? I decided that I wasn't going to sleep and might as well tackle this tonight. I called his cell and immediately got voice mail. His phone is off. PERFECT! I pulled up the list of hotels in that city and called the one that I thought would be the most likely. The desk clerk on the phone took a while finding his reservation. Then he wanted to know who I was. I said Mrs. ______. He acted like "someone's going down tonight" and finally rang the room. Hub answered the phone half asleep and I told him that he needed to sit up and talk. First I said that I had decided to join him on this trip and was coming out tomorrow. "Fine" he says. JERK! Then I said, "Or maybe I'll just meet you at the hotel tomorrow night here in town". He says "Huh?" I told him that I knew about the reservations and who was he with and who would he be meeting. He wanted to know where I was getting all of this and told him from his hotel reservations. He tried to tell me that I didn't know what I was talking about and that they must be old. I pull the reservations up and start reading it to him. I said "It says it right here. Crowne Plaza - 1 night - March 6, 2011." He reminds me that we are in April not March and tells me to go to bed. I remembered that he had a meeting there last month. OOPS!!! He just told me to go to bed and hung up. So like I said, I have "egg on my face". I have already left him a voice mail, a text message and e-mail to apologize. I'm sure there will be more and at least this disaster was averted. Silly woman! Later.