News Flash! I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!!

So nice to know that after all 28 years, my husband and I still really enjoy each other's company. Do I sound surprised? Maybe I am...a little. We have been so busy just going through the motions of life that I am afraid that we have neglected each other a bit. As so many couples, we have been on auto-pilot; ships passing in the night; text and e-mail buddies; getting by; friendly neighbors...you get the idea. Last week was different though. The young adults were in their own home (thank you, God) and #2 son was gone for a week on vacation with a friend. We were A-L-O-N-E. Just us. The two of us. No kids. No one else's kids. Scary stuff. It was greatness! We really didn't even do much. Hung out together. Laughed a lot. Enjoyed the hummingbirds. Watched late movies and slept late. Hub worked from home except for one day that he was gone for about 6 hours. Guess what! I missed him! Isn't that fabulous? We did paint and redecorate our son's bedroom while he was gone. That was even fun. What a great week!

This week...well, this week has been a little more normal for us. #2 son flew home Saturday bringing his friend to spend the week with us. He got off the plane asking for ibuprofen. He has double ear infections. He has come in our bedroom every night crying with pain and has ended up sleeping in a recliner in our bedroom. He was running pretty high fever, too. We were at an emergency clinic on Sunday morning and I took him back to the doc today. You would think he would be symptom free after 4 days of antibiotics. He is just now feeling a bit better. We are doing everything that we can to help him. His friend flies home on Saturday and on Sunday, #2 is leaving for a week at the beach with another friend and family. He has got to be well. Mommy and Daddy want another fun week. :)

On Sunday night, we received a call from #1 son's girlfriend. He was sharpening a knife and his hand slipped, slicing open his thumb. They spent the night in the E.R. He cut a tendon which will require surgery. That is now scheduled for next Monday. He will not be able to use his hand for 4-6 weeks. Great for his new job! Someone also threw something through the window in his ghetto home. Hub went over there today and replaced the glass for them. Hub has actually been pretty good about leaving them to handle things themselves lately. (Knock on wood.) As soon as he saw blood, #1 expected us to jump in the car and come take care of him. When they called, I just said "It sounds like you need stitches. Better go to the hospital." He couldn't believe we weren't coming, but they did just fine. They did call several times during the night with the last one being at 5 a.m. But hey, that's improvement. One of the calls was actually kind of funny when they were trying to give the hospital the car insurance card instead of the health insurance card. We totally enjoyed it, too, when they came over on Monday AND THEN LEFT!!! After they left, I told Hub to make sure that the garage door was down and the door was locked. Just in case.

Well, we are looking forward to another childless week next week. Hub has a business trip next week and I plan to tag along for a few days. He will be in meetings most of the days, but I am quite happy to entertain myself. One night, they are having casino night so that ought to be fun. We plan on staying an extra day.

Hope your weeks are going well. Go fall in love with your husband.....again.

Later.

'

They're out!!!!!

It finally happened! Sh-hhh. Did I say that out loud? My son and the girlfriend have moved out. Is that angels I hear singing in the background? We spent yesterday getting their things over to their new address. There is just a bit still here. #1 son called at 8:00 this morning about it. Us: "No! Stay there. We will bring it to you this afternoon!" It is sad how excited we are.

After all of the months of looking on the internet and newspaper for housing (that would be me looking, of course) and them poo-pooing signing even a 6-month lease, the girlfriend picked this house out on her own. It is a 2-bedroom, holes in the wall, foundation shifting home in the ghetto with a one year lease that they will be paying at least $200 a month too much for. I don't think I would be able to get any sleep there. And the kitchen....ew-w-w-w. She didn't even realize that it did not have a refrigerator until after they had signed. So much to learn! My mantra is now "I'm sure you will figure something out."

We got in Thursday night from a week of travel. The car says we drove over 1800 miles. We met family at their lakehouse in Kentucky for a couple of days. #2 son took a friend with him and they had a blast jet skiing all day. Lots of fun visiting and then a bonfire and s'mores in the evening. Good family time.

From there we went to Indianapolis. That was where the boys dubbed our trip "The Dead People Tour". Hub had promised his aging aunt to take her to her parents (his grandparents) graves. He had not been there since he was 10, so we were relying on her to get us there. Oops! It is a huge cemetery and we had two cars, four adults and two boys looking at every tombstone while the aunt waited in the car. Bless her heart. She was embarrassed that she was so confused, but after probably an hour or wandering, we found them. So next we had to go across town to another cemetery to find another set of grandparents. This cemetery was actually pretty cool. Even the boys were a bit fascinated. It was very ornate; lots of fancy monuments and even a few celebrities including President Benjamin Harrison and John Dillinger.

After that adventure, we went over to a cousin's home for a 4th of July celebration. Lots of family, lots of little babies to hold, lots of fabulous food and great fun. I love being with my husband's cousins. We spent the next two nights at one of the cousin's farm. That is a treat in itself. SO beautiful! Such a different lifestyle than mine. Don't know that I would want to do it, but sure is fun to visit.

While on this trip, I got to have my very first Bloggy Buddy visit. I met "Birdie" from strelitziamusings.blogspot.com at a mall for lunch. She was gorgeous and gracious just like I knew she would be. So much fun! We chatted and chatted while we were serenaded by a pianist and a soloist in the atrium. Not a bad lunch!

We left there and took the young teens to a Children's Museum. Knowing that they would not be seen from anyone from their school, they had a great time and didn't worry about looking cool.
There was also a travelling exhibition of Barbie there. (Sigh.) I walked all through it and remembered all my Barbie's and the outfits they had on display that I had once played with. Barbie has had so many careers. Ken is still a moocher with no job. He still was just hanging out at the Barbie Dreamhouse and driving her convertible. ;)

That evening, we had the next stop of our "Dead People Tour". (That sounds so bad!) While we were driving up from Kentucky, we received a call that one of Hub's Indianapolis aunts had passed away. She was 92 and had a great life. The visitation was that night so we all went over there to see her son that we had not seen in many years and pay our respects. #2 son's friend had never seen a dead body so this was an experience. After greeting family, I just let them go to a side room with their I-pods. My family didn't stay for the funeral the next day as none of had brought appropriate clothes or shoes.

We decided to break up the long trip home and drive 6 hours back to the lakehouse and then 6 hours home the next day. On the way, we saw a sign for Abraham Lincoln's birthplace. (Never knew that he had been born in Kentucky.) Since this was our "Dead People Tour", we drove 20 miles off the route, toured and learned more about Lincoln. We started out again and then Hub thought about Mammoth Cave. He and I had been there with #1, but #2 and his friend had never been a cave. Here we go again traipsing through the countryside. Kentucky designs the roads thinking that you need to enjoy all of the state's beauty. The roads are winding and it take twice as long to get anywhere. We got there late in the day but just in time to catch the last tour. It's not as pretty as Carlsbad but it is interesting. Also, at Carlsbad Caverns, you take an elevator down into the earth. Here you walk down. Lots and lots and lots of stairs. It is 54 degrees in the cave so it is okay. But then, you have to come out. Up lots and lots and lots of stairs. We were all sweating by the time we got out and I am sure my face was beet red. Next time, I will just wait in the gift shop. Our 6 hour drive had now turned into almost 12. The next day was rainy, so there was no skiing. We were all anxious to get home Thursday night.

So no "adults" living up stairs now. #2 son flew out this morning to go on vacation with family friends in Texas. Mom and Dad have the house to ourselves for a week to chase each other around. Woo-hoo!

Later.

Reality TV

Reality TV. My addiction. There....I've said it. No sense in signing me up for "Reality TV Anonymous". I'm quite happy with my addiction. It makes me feel more sane and normal. It makes me feel good about myself. I don't feel the need to get new boobs, lips and hair extensions. I don't dream of being a singer or designer. I don't live in a world where turning over a table is part of a normal dinner party. I don't have to say "Yes" to a dress while my mother and best friends pick it apart. (I now know why I went by myself to find my own wedding dress. Good decision.) No one called me a Bridezilla.....I don't think. I wouldn't last long on a deserted island fending for myself. I don't have a bunch of celebrity sisters or a pushy mother that keeps me in the magazines. I can kind of cut hair but have no desire to run a salon. But boy do I like watching all of this.....stuff.

At the moment, I'm watching "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding". The Gypsy or Irish Traveler culture is SO different and very closed off. I've never seen wedding dresses of this kind of gaudy opulence. Way, way over the top in bling, ruffles and material alone. Only to be topped by the bridesmaids. Interesting enough, the culture is totally male driven. Girls marry young and are then virtually the property of their husband. Their entire life is geared to becoming a cooking, cleaning machine of a housewife in a small trailer. (A little like me. NOT.) Yet, they show these young girls dressed like hookers at really young ages out to attract men. The Pussycat Dolls have nothing on these girls as they dance the part as well. It's also interesting to me that they portray that in this culture, girls don't drink and certainly don't have sex before marriage. Still this show has more bare midriffs and more boobs spilling out than any of the "Real Housewives".

Big, fancy dresses are not just for weddings. They're showing a 7 year old little girl's first communion in a princess style dress made with 550 yards of pink netting. The dress weighs twice as much as she does. She can hardly walk. She arrives at the church in a stretch with her friends drinking sparkling cider. Huh?

So why do I like reality TV so much? I still have the prodigal son in my home. Glad he came back but it is way past time for him to find his own place again. Then there is his girlfriend that we are raising. I keep encouraging her to make amends with her father. It's time for her family to step up. Oh, I didn't tell you that we finally got them to take their dog somewhere else. Of course, I was deemed evil, but the backyard can finally be reclaimed. This weekend was the latest in a line of "deadlines" that Hub had placed on them to be out. They have decided that they are moving back "again" to where we lived. Until then they will be living with his boss. Oy vey!

Yep, reality TV seems to be a great diversion. Everyone has their family stuff. This is how I get through mine. Oh, and I just found out that Hub has asked #1 son and the girlfriend to come back here and house sit while we are away for about 6 days. Looking for a party? My house - next weekend.

Wonder what is coming on TV next...........

Later

Happy Father's Day, Daddy

Dear Diary,

Father's Day 2011 is almost over. It doesn't take Hallmark to remind me of Daddy. I can only wish that I could send him a card. I still miss him every day. Not so much the missing that makes you weep or sends you spiraling out of control. Just the reminder that I'm just talking to him in my head about daily life. He was my cheerleader with all of the answers. Not that he would just hand those answers over. He took way too many pschology classes for that. But somehow, he would direct me into finding my own answer. (Or at least thinking it was my own answer.)

Life can be really hard sometimes. He was my constant. Always there. Always believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself. Always loved me. I really want to ask him about what to do with his grandson. He is driving us over the cliff. Of course, I do know in my heart what he would say. He would just say "Love him." He would say it quietly, powerfully, and in a way that I knew he understood.

Daddy was my first boyfriend. My brother told me once that when I was little I never called him "Daddy". I called him "My Daddy". Guess I was marking my territory. When I became an adult and lived in another city, it was not unusual for him to call me on Monday mornings as I was walking/running into the office. On the other end: "Hi Kid. Just called to say hello and tell you I love you. Have a great week."

Anyway, can't send him a card. He left for Heaven 27 years ago next month. If I could it would say something like...."Thank you for the wings you gave me. Thank you for the guidance you gave me even when I paid it no mind. I still heard you. Thank you for loving me like no other. I miss you, Daddy and I will love you forever."

Yep, Dear Diary, that's what it would say.

Happy Father's Day, My Daddy.

I hope I'm never the same.

May is my month. Between anniversary, Mother's Day and my birthday, I get a present almost every week. Poor Hub. He does a really good job of spoiling me. He had been out of town all last week and then came home with Corinthian Chimes (that I had hinted for at Mother's Day and thought he had forgotten) and a freshwater pearl bracelet that we had seen together at a local jewelry store. The chimes have such a rich, deep, perfect tone and I love them on my back patio.

Even better though, the man did for me what I truly wanted. I felt so very drawn to go to Joplin, MO and see if we could be of help. Getting the news that a friend of ours who now lives there was trapped in the Wal-Mart and missing for several hours, it just made it so personal. Not sure what to do or expect, we loaded up an SUV with 32 cases of water and headed out early Saturday morning. Poor Hub. It's a 4-1/2 hour drive and he had just driven back on Friday afternoon from a 7 hour trip in the same direction. What a guy!

We got there and went to our friend's church where there was a hub of activity. People and trucks were pulling in from all over the country. The people in Tuscaloosa, AL, who had just been through a similar situation, sent truck with things as well. People of all ages were drawn there to help in all kinds of ways. There was one man there that clearly had been a victim of a severe stroke. He was passing out waters and shuffling big trash cans back and forth relentlessly. I spent most of that day inside the church sorting through clothing and supplies. Hub was outside unloading trucks and helping to set up tents. Crews with chain saws were going out from place to place to cut trees so that they could be moved. Other crews went out to help people gather what they could salvage from their homes and to offer food, supplies and comfort. Another crew kept fresh food prepared for all the volunteers and survivors. The large church building was full of makeshift bedding and many people who had lost their homes were staying there along with the volunteers. We had brought bedding and had actually planned to just sleep in the back of the SUV. Kind of romantic, I had thought beforehand, but after a long day of work and sweating, we were happy to go home with a couple we had been working with when they offered us a shower and a place with A/C to sleep.

When we first drove into town, our GPS took us a bit around the outskirts of town so we saw very little destruction. Hub had gone into town with a guy to pick up more tents. He came back very somber just saying "You won't believe it!". He drove me through on the way to the home of our hosts for the night. He was right. It as all very apocolyptic. I expected to see Bruce Willis coming out from behind somewhere. It struck me how mostly void everything was of color. The pictures do not do it justice. Everything was in bits and mangled. Paint was pulled off of most things and trees were stripped of bark. You would be looking at something and realize it was a car. No, two or three cars tangled together. People were sitting on piles around their place to protect it from looters. (Our friend said while she was crawling out from Wal-Mart, that there were already people looting the store.) Everyone looked somber and many still disoriented. I looked at it in unbelief. I actually felt a bit guilty of taking pictures of their nightmare. People had literally been sucked out of the sunroofs of their cars while their seatbelts were still belted. I can't comprehend a force like that.

But I also saw a powerful resilience in people. There were several American flags hung on to pieces of metal and bare branches. On one torn house we saw, someone had spraypainted "We will be okay." We saw other relief centers scattered throughout the city. Lots of people in each of them. On Sunday, Obama came to town. We saw lines of people on the streets waving flags and holding signs that read "God loves Joplin" and "Joplin will rise". It was great for the President to come and acknowledge and comfort these people. Someone made the comment though that so many are so deep in the devastation, that they may not even get the word that he would be there. The devastated area is wide and they are working in from the perimeter to clear. You can barely get to the center areas. That will probably explain for some lost people.

On another note, the President's visit halted most of the work for the day until he had left. Curfew had been set from 9 p.m. until 9 a.m. so no one could even get in the areas in the morning before he arrived due to security. That wasn't good. Many, many people were able to be there because it was a holiday weekend. Hated to lose most of a day and all of the workers that had to leave. Bush was criticized severely for flying over New Orleans as to not interfere with the work. Not sure what the answer is but I guess Presidents just can't win this one.

Anyway, I feel changed a bit by what I saw and experienced. The areas around Joplin are truly beautiful. It did make me note the comparison between the natural beauty that God had created and the man-made creations that was crushed, crumpled, shattered and devoid of color. Our hosts said that the tornado was heading directly toward their beautiful property and then abruptly turned a different way. Their front yards had been cleared that day by teenagers of about 9 leaf bags of little pieces. They found a few personal effects from unknown homes. A few snapshots. I noticed out a back window where it had not been touched. Little pieces and shreds of gray everywhere. There was a piece of sheet metal wrapped around a branch high in a tree. Will probably have to stay there. Looked like a pink top laying on the ground. Mostly, though pieces not 2"x 2".

What a mighty God we worship. People asked "Where was God?" I saw him everywhere. In the power of destruction and in the hands, hearts and faces of people there to help other people. There are lots of stories of sacrifice, heroism, miracles, etc. Lots of hugs and lots of shared tears. That's where God was. Make no mistake about it.

Later.

What does a diploma, a roller derby and a fire all have in common?

weekend (noun) Any two-day period given regularly as a weekly rest period from one's work.

RIGHT! It can be a whole lot of work to get that rest thing. And then there is the whole self-imposed stress thing, too. But sometimes, it is so worth it.

Hub's flight back from Georgia the night before was really delayed due to bad weather. He didn't get home after 1 a.m. This meant that we had to go back to the airport Friday morning to pick up the mini-van we rented. We all started out tired and ended up not leaving until after noon. It rained all the way. We went through two significant hail storms and at one point we were under tornado warnings. One problem; weather warnings are issued by counties. Who knows counties in a different state? I'm just learning the county names for the ones around us. We blindly kept going; praying all the way. Ignorance can be bliss, I say. We passed through all kinds of flooding due to the Mississippi River, etc. We told our family that we literally came through "hail and high water" to get there.

Love, love, love being with this family. Lots to celebrate. Much loved niece graduating from college; another niece received her master's degree; two engagements; one adorable grand-niece to meet and love on, our military hero nephew home for a visit after three years. Good stuff. Plus this is a really fun group. Our weekend at the lake was cold, with rain or drizzle the whole weekend. We still had a blast.

I can now say that I now have been to a roller derby. If you have never been, it is a total hoot. Our niece's league has bouts to raise money for charity. This week was for Susan G. Comen. My sweet, gorgeous niece becomes an animal on the track. Her team (Buxom Babes) beat the other team (Tiny Tatas) and she was awarded the MVP award. Greatness! These girls are tough. Wow! What a fun time. Never knew that could be so much fun.

As always, my klutz-side was present and reared its ugly head. We were leaving for the roller derby and I had my reading glasses on trying to run an update on my phone. (Stupid!!!) I "thought" that I knew where I was and that the sidewalk made a right angle. Forgot that there was also a significant step down. I did a nose dive out of my slide sandals onto the sidewalk. I finally sat up and had to stay there as I was seeing stars. I was hurt; was mad at myself, and was dirty and wet. My elbow had a big strawberry and was already bruising and swelling. My ribs are bruised and everything hurts. Don't think that I broke anything, but I certainly did feel like a fossil. I'm still stiff and sore, so I have the constant pain to remind me. My family has had a field day with the jokes.

"The Girlfriend" has been on best, well maybe better, behavior lately. That was totally all over this weekend. Not sure if she is on a perpetual, permanent, painful period or what. She was snippy, snappy, snoopy, and sour. (Brought to you by the letters "P" and "S".) Maybe she is actually going to move out on June 1 so she figures she can let it all hang out. She still is swaddling up to Hub a little. Doesn't want to break it off with "sugar daddy" just yet. Hub and I had a talk about it and how inappropriate it was. He actually seemed to have finally noticed and said that he understood my feelings. He is ready for a "BUH-BYE" as well. #2 caught her discussing me with new-niece-in-law-to-be. Before we got in the car to come back, I tried to take her aside to have a private conversation. It was just like talking to a little child who knows that they are in trouble. Me: "Can we talk?" Girl: "Why-y-y-y-y? I don't wa-a-a-ant to-o-o-o." Seriously? She finally came out and I asked her what was up. She said that she didn't want to talk but that changes would have to be made. I'm all over that! Anyway, since she wasn't going to talk, I just told her that she needed to treat us all a little nicer and that badmouthing to members of our family was not cool. Anyway, she was pissy to everyone in the car all the way home including #1 and said that she was sick and throwing up. I made the same pit stops and didn't see anything like that. She did run in when we stopped for fast food and ordered herself chicken, fries and a chocolate shake. Then last night, we stopped at Subway and she had a foot-long sandwich! Still playing the sick card. Stick a fork in me. I'm DONE!

Any who, don't want to leave this as a complete bitch-fest. We did have a good time. Sunday night we had a bonfire by the lake with all the limbs that had come off in the storm. Haven't done that in a very long time. Some made s'mores. I just like to burn some marshmallows. Sat around and talked by the fire until late. Told funny GrandMa and GrandDad stories; kids stories and a few war stories from Afghanistan.

It is so good being with this group. Their dad, my brother-in-law, died a few years ago due to brain cancer. The kids seem to look to Hub as their father figure now. I'm so proud of him for the way he takes that very seriously and tries to be there for them. I know his brother would have done the same if the roles had been different. He was so proud of his family and with good cause. They are doing well; starting families of their own, and life goes on in a beautiful fashion. Well done, Dad.

Later.

Ode to Twenty Eight Years

Twenty-eight years ago today, I married my forever love. Definitely hasn't be my forever "like" (that man doesn't exist); but he is my forever love. I remember the preacher used scripture from the Book of Ruth within our vows. "Whether thou goest, I will go." I loved it. I thought it was such beautiful scripture. No one told me that Hub really thought I meant it and put that part to the test.

I've been thinking about our past a lot today. It's the kind of thing you do on anniversaries. Everyone seems to be doing number lists these days and I will try to follow suite.

• 1 - Wedding (so far)



• 2 - People (not an option)



• 10 - Relocations



• 8 - Homes bought together



• 1 - Step-Daughter



• 1 - Son-in-law (Now Removed)



• 3 - Surgeries for infertility



• 1 - Pregnancy



• 1 - Miscarriage



• 1 - Failed Adoption



• 2 - Beautiful Boys to fill our lives.



• 6 - Dogs, 1 Cat, 2 Birds and numerous Goldfish (one at a time and all named Dorothy)



• 17 - Years the cat has been with us



• 19 - Years we have been a member of a school PTA/PTO



• 2 - Major job layoff and several career changes



• 9 - Churches that filled our spirits and gave us direction



• 2 - Countries we have visited (we need to do better there)



• 13 - New Cars bought together



• 5 - Cars our son has wrecked



• 8 - Number of high school reunions we have attended together



• 2 - Mothers and 2 Dads that we have lost and miss dearly



• Too many other deaths (1 Brother; 1 Brother-in-Law; 1 Nephew; 1 Grandmother; Many Aunts & Uncles)



• 2 - Beds that have been in our master bedroom



• 5 - Mattress sets



• 1 - Formal Dining Room Suite (only thing that is left from our first house)



• Many, many arguments



• An equal amount of "kiss and make-ups"

And they said it would never last. We fooled them.

Love you, Honey! Shame I don't let you read my blog.

(Don't start on me. I will make him a copy.)

Later.