I made it and I'm pooped. My first week of a working full-time is behind me. The last time I got up at 6:00 every morning, I had a baby to feed. That was 10 years ago. This schedule is going to take some time to get use to. So glad we have a 3-day weekend. I have met so many people this week that my head is swimming with names. I brought home an annual from last year to try to put faces and names together.
The week was good, but not without a little drama. The gal that trained me was great. She was with me on Monday and Tuesday and things were busy yet relatively smooth for the first days of school. On Wednesday, the 4-year-old son of a teacher hit his head on cement at preschool. The dad was totally shaking. He brought him back to school with him where he proceeded to start throwing up. Of course, he had a concussion. He's fine now. We arranged for clean up and a last minute substitute and all was well. On Thursday, we had the drug dogs come through. I don't care how honest and clean you are, they are still intimidating. When they went past my desk, I kept thinking "What if they smell my dog on me and react?" Also, the air conditioning went out in the school. Most of my day was spent writing maintenance orders, fielding the "My room is hot" calls from the teachers, and sweating. Then the icing on the cake was on Friday when the assistant principal brings me a file called "severe weather" and goes over it with me. It was very organized with all the procedures, signs for parents as to where there children were, etc. This was to be my responsibility. Who knew that a little after 3 p.m. that afternoon a storm would blow in and we would have to go into that mode. We got crowded with parents trying to get their kids out before it was declared. When "severe weather" is declared, we move to the library and set up 4 stations with computers to streamline the process of getting almost 800 kids release to their parents. We have to pull up each child's name, see what room they are in and compare the parents ID with what is on their emergency form. We got set up in there and I'm thinking this is a pretty good plan.....wait, all the computers go down. The network for the whole school district crashed. Plan B...the Principal's secretary brings in her accordion files with the hard copy of every child's enrollment sheet and we check it off manually. And they are not alphabetized with the the letter. (They will be next week if I have to do it myself.) It was going to take forever. I was so happy when the weather subsided about 10 minutes later and we could just say GO HOME before it starts again. Everyone kept asking me if I was going to come back next week. We will see........
My 10-year-old had grass drill tryouts for football this week. He is quite the athlete and one of the coaches really wants him on his team. Since this was the look-see for the coaches before drafting, he wrote me and told me to tell Connor to just put in about 75%. I can't do that. I am not going to tell my child not to do his best on anything. He said that he saw the coach at tryouts and he kept telling him to slow down. This guy is a good guy and coach. His team won the Little League Super Bowl last year. Hub really wants our son to be on his team, but I refuse to tell him to cheat. The boys are 10, people. "Teach your children well."
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Cell Phones
Well, I did it again. I hate it when I do it. I went back on one of my parenting "I'll never do that" statements. My 10 year old has a cell phone. His friends started showing up with them 2-3 years ago. I thought their parents had to be nuts!!! Then I got a job. My world is slowly turning upside down. Now my little cherub will be walking home (with a friend of course) and letting himself into his home with his own little key. (Insert tears!) I couldn't stand the thought of all that I could imagine so.....down to the phone store I trot and come back with an orange cell phone. I've joined the other side. Aaaaghhh!
At least I am a hero to a little boy. Never saw him this excited over anything. He has photographed everything and everyone. Although Hub and I got the same phone a couple of months ago, he has found features on it I could only dream of. I have no clue how to get to them. He also has become a textaholic. It takes me way to long to text a message. Must simpler to just call. Also, the calls are free between us, the house and anyone on this service. But he likes to text. I will let him have a little fun with it and if it keeps up too much, we will have to burst his bubble. I heard a teen say the other day that the last month he had 2000 text messages and their plan called for like $0.40 each over 300. Can't believe that boy is still breathing!!!
After spending most of the past 15 years just enjoying (?) adventures in parenting, I will start my new job on Monday. I went by the school after a meeting on Friday just to hang out a bit and get my bearings. I was so welcomed. Seems like a really nice staff. I have always dreaded the first week of a job when there is much to learn, new faces and you come home totally mentally and physically exhausted each day. I went to the grocery store and stocked up on frozen entrees this week. I know it will either be that or eating out way too much.
Say a little prayer for the school kids and "school people" this week. Remember the school zones!
Later.
At least I am a hero to a little boy. Never saw him this excited over anything. He has photographed everything and everyone. Although Hub and I got the same phone a couple of months ago, he has found features on it I could only dream of. I have no clue how to get to them. He also has become a textaholic. It takes me way to long to text a message. Must simpler to just call. Also, the calls are free between us, the house and anyone on this service. But he likes to text. I will let him have a little fun with it and if it keeps up too much, we will have to burst his bubble. I heard a teen say the other day that the last month he had 2000 text messages and their plan called for like $0.40 each over 300. Can't believe that boy is still breathing!!!
After spending most of the past 15 years just enjoying (?) adventures in parenting, I will start my new job on Monday. I went by the school after a meeting on Friday just to hang out a bit and get my bearings. I was so welcomed. Seems like a really nice staff. I have always dreaded the first week of a job when there is much to learn, new faces and you come home totally mentally and physically exhausted each day. I went to the grocery store and stocked up on frozen entrees this week. I know it will either be that or eating out way too much.
Say a little prayer for the school kids and "school people" this week. Remember the school zones!
Later.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
FAMILY???
What's the deal with family? Does anyone else have family members that are so self-absorbed that they can't/won't be there for family needs? They sure seem to have time for friends and acquaintances that don't mean anything in the big picture, but not for the ones that use to share the family dinner table or the ones they creeped down the stairs with to see if Santa had been there. I know that I have dealt with this before, but Hub has got me all wound up again.
I wrote earlier about bro-in-law disclosing that he was struggling with alcoholism. Hub called his sister last night to check on her and see if she had talked to him. NO. He said you really ought to call him. We-e-e-e-l-l-l she said that wouldn't know what to say. Boo-hoo! How hard is "I love you, Brother"? Why should I be surprised? Both of his sisters have been a non-show when it has come to the struggles we have dealt with during the last couple of years. We have been in tears and destroyed because our son is locked up and they can't even ask how about him. The subject is always the little class they are teaching, or re-decorating the new house or how well their kids have done in sports. In looking for an excuse for them (yeah, I don't know why I do that), I had decided that maybe we were too sensitive or too wrapped up in our own stories. Guess not if they can't respond to the other brother either.
So just a reminder. Take care of others, but take care of family first. No matter how busy we get or how far we are physically from each other, there is something about the comfort that only they can bring to the table. Just an "I care". You can't fix the problems, but just a little interest. The "talking it out part" can still be with the friends that we chosen as our confidant, soul mate, BFF, etc. Personally, I just want to know that the family cares, too.
Later.
I wrote earlier about bro-in-law disclosing that he was struggling with alcoholism. Hub called his sister last night to check on her and see if she had talked to him. NO. He said you really ought to call him. We-e-e-e-l-l-l she said that wouldn't know what to say. Boo-hoo! How hard is "I love you, Brother"? Why should I be surprised? Both of his sisters have been a non-show when it has come to the struggles we have dealt with during the last couple of years. We have been in tears and destroyed because our son is locked up and they can't even ask how about him. The subject is always the little class they are teaching, or re-decorating the new house or how well their kids have done in sports. In looking for an excuse for them (yeah, I don't know why I do that), I had decided that maybe we were too sensitive or too wrapped up in our own stories. Guess not if they can't respond to the other brother either.
So just a reminder. Take care of others, but take care of family first. No matter how busy we get or how far we are physically from each other, there is something about the comfort that only they can bring to the table. Just an "I care". You can't fix the problems, but just a little interest. The "talking it out part" can still be with the friends that we chosen as our confidant, soul mate, BFF, etc. Personally, I just want to know that the family cares, too.
Later.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Life goes on.....
Relationships can be so tricky. I feel pulled so many ways this weekend. I received an e-mail from by brother-in-law yesterday telling us that he has been dealing with alcoholism for the past 30 years and has decided to take control back of his life. I feel so badly that we had no clue he was struggling with this. He is a wonderful, loving man and although he lives halfway across the US from us, I have always felt very close to him and his partner. I am so proud of him for taking up this fight. It will be amazingly hard and now he is looking for acceptance from his family. I hope he gets it from everyone. After going through what we have with our son, we realize firsthand that family relationships - that we tend to take for granted for support - can quickly let you down. Many times we have found friendships to be more supportive. You never know until you need it.
And then sometimes not. Tonight I'm feeling a little (or a lot) let down from some close friends. At some point we have all gone some of those "extra friendship miles" to do a big favor for a friend. You don't do it for the gratitude. You do it because they really need it, want it, deserve it, etc. and because you want to because they are your friend. At the same time, it doesn't feel very good to bust your butt for someone and then feel totally screwed over for it. It is time to put on my "big girl panties" and go on, but right now I'm just a little pissed.
Now that's out (kind of), on with good stuff. I was offered a job with the school district the past week. It is going to be hard going back to work, but after hub's job shifts, it will be a blessing. I'm just nervous.
We also had some neighbors come by this weekend. They are a very young couple who look to us like parents. YIKES! They married shortly after they bought the house across the street about 3 years ago. We went to their wedding and have been with them and counseled them through some hard adjustments to a new marriage. On more than one occasion, it looked pretty doubtful. Anyway, they came by to tell us they were pregnant. And it gets better.......twins! Pretty exciting news!!
Anyway, life goes on. It can get pretty complicated but never totally dull. Sometimes the range of emotions flow through quickly. Hard to take it all in. What is it they say? Better than the alternative........
Later.
And then sometimes not. Tonight I'm feeling a little (or a lot) let down from some close friends. At some point we have all gone some of those "extra friendship miles" to do a big favor for a friend. You don't do it for the gratitude. You do it because they really need it, want it, deserve it, etc. and because you want to because they are your friend. At the same time, it doesn't feel very good to bust your butt for someone and then feel totally screwed over for it. It is time to put on my "big girl panties" and go on, but right now I'm just a little pissed.
Now that's out (kind of), on with good stuff. I was offered a job with the school district the past week. It is going to be hard going back to work, but after hub's job shifts, it will be a blessing. I'm just nervous.
We also had some neighbors come by this weekend. They are a very young couple who look to us like parents. YIKES! They married shortly after they bought the house across the street about 3 years ago. We went to their wedding and have been with them and counseled them through some hard adjustments to a new marriage. On more than one occasion, it looked pretty doubtful. Anyway, they came by to tell us they were pregnant. And it gets better.......twins! Pretty exciting news!!
Anyway, life goes on. It can get pretty complicated but never totally dull. Sometimes the range of emotions flow through quickly. Hard to take it all in. What is it they say? Better than the alternative........
Later.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
SENILITY IS SETTING IN!
I'm really losing ground in "bloggerville". I seem to have a hard time settling down to write. Then when I do, I start reading other blogs and you guys are so smart, interesting and witty (Rox) and then I feel I have nothing to say. How narcissistic!
Do you ever find yourself talking to a blog in your head instead of writing it down? I sometimes have whole conversations with you. Shame no one hears it. Or maybe not. (I feel that I have just admitted that senility is kicking in!)
We went to prison today to see our son. He was quite funny telling his little brother about things he once did to his teachers. Some we knew of....some we didn't. Yikes! I may need to sit down and write letters of apology. My oldest nephew is only 5 years younger than me. I love to listen when he and his brothers are reminiscing with my sister and admitting to things that they did that she never knew of. She would love to see me squirm now.
My sister's husband died one year ago this past Friday. They would have been married 48 years next week. Life's not fair.
I called the parole board this week to see if there was anything new. I haven't called since he was turned down in late May. The website show maybe January so I left it as that. The lady said that his file is in review and was pulled June 13th! Although last time it took about 6 months for them to act on it, she said that it would probably be looked at in a couple of weeks. Don't know if she knows what she's talking about. We had all kinds of time lines before. Anyway, we didn't tell him. We were all so very disappointed before and we are finding out that "the system" doesn't always work rationally. What's that saying......"hope for everything but expect nothing"? It's hard enough for him there without repeating this kind of disappointment.
Our son told us that they have been on "lockdown" since Wednesday. They have to stay in their cells and are brought bag lunches instead of going to lunchroom. Peanut butter sandwiches three times a day!!! He was so hungry for the vending machine snacks that we are allowed to buy him during visitation. I'm sure he had a tummy ache afterwards. He says that they do these lockdown for about a week every 6 months so that every corner and every cell is checked over.
On the way home, Hub brought up the fact that he will likely have some post traumatic stress symptoms when he comes back. He said that it is so hot that he takes off his mat and puts a sheet on the steel bed to sleep. He will have to get use to a mattress again and said not to be surprised if he sleeps on the floor some. Both of my sons love milk. He hasn't had anything but powdered milk in a very long time. It is so unsettling when we mention something that he has no clue what it is now. His brother was trying to tell him about playing Guitar Hero video game. Never heard of it. His dad had on an "under armour shirt" today. He asked about it but didn't know what he was talking about. These are just little things but can you imagine how strange it will be getting use to the world. Even air conditioning and decent, healthy food. So-o-o-o many changes.
I have a job interview tomorrow. May be just a courtesy interview but who knows. It's for a school aide and my principal friend mentioned to her principal friend that I was looking so her assistant called. Anyway, I haven't been on an interview in so long. I have bugged Hub to death with THE question.....WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR????? I also informed him that should I get this job, there would be clothes to be bought. Not a good time to do this as we haven't had a check in a while. Anyway, send up a little prayer.
Looks like I did find something to fill a few lines. Nothing smart of witty but sometimes that just the way life rolls.
Later.
Do you ever find yourself talking to a blog in your head instead of writing it down? I sometimes have whole conversations with you. Shame no one hears it. Or maybe not. (I feel that I have just admitted that senility is kicking in!)
We went to prison today to see our son. He was quite funny telling his little brother about things he once did to his teachers. Some we knew of....some we didn't. Yikes! I may need to sit down and write letters of apology. My oldest nephew is only 5 years younger than me. I love to listen when he and his brothers are reminiscing with my sister and admitting to things that they did that she never knew of. She would love to see me squirm now.
My sister's husband died one year ago this past Friday. They would have been married 48 years next week. Life's not fair.
I called the parole board this week to see if there was anything new. I haven't called since he was turned down in late May. The website show maybe January so I left it as that. The lady said that his file is in review and was pulled June 13th! Although last time it took about 6 months for them to act on it, she said that it would probably be looked at in a couple of weeks. Don't know if she knows what she's talking about. We had all kinds of time lines before. Anyway, we didn't tell him. We were all so very disappointed before and we are finding out that "the system" doesn't always work rationally. What's that saying......"hope for everything but expect nothing"? It's hard enough for him there without repeating this kind of disappointment.
Our son told us that they have been on "lockdown" since Wednesday. They have to stay in their cells and are brought bag lunches instead of going to lunchroom. Peanut butter sandwiches three times a day!!! He was so hungry for the vending machine snacks that we are allowed to buy him during visitation. I'm sure he had a tummy ache afterwards. He says that they do these lockdown for about a week every 6 months so that every corner and every cell is checked over.
On the way home, Hub brought up the fact that he will likely have some post traumatic stress symptoms when he comes back. He said that it is so hot that he takes off his mat and puts a sheet on the steel bed to sleep. He will have to get use to a mattress again and said not to be surprised if he sleeps on the floor some. Both of my sons love milk. He hasn't had anything but powdered milk in a very long time. It is so unsettling when we mention something that he has no clue what it is now. His brother was trying to tell him about playing Guitar Hero video game. Never heard of it. His dad had on an "under armour shirt" today. He asked about it but didn't know what he was talking about. These are just little things but can you imagine how strange it will be getting use to the world. Even air conditioning and decent, healthy food. So-o-o-o many changes.
I have a job interview tomorrow. May be just a courtesy interview but who knows. It's for a school aide and my principal friend mentioned to her principal friend that I was looking so her assistant called. Anyway, I haven't been on an interview in so long. I have bugged Hub to death with THE question.....WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR????? I also informed him that should I get this job, there would be clothes to be bought. Not a good time to do this as we haven't had a check in a while. Anyway, send up a little prayer.
Looks like I did find something to fill a few lines. Nothing smart of witty but sometimes that just the way life rolls.
Later.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Mama Mia
I'm off my soapbox now. It is safe to come out.
I just got back from seeing "Mama Mia". How fun was that? I may have to buy the CD when it comes out. I think that movie could cheer up anyone. Love Meryl Streep. I want to be her friend. She always seems so real and fun.
Hub will actually start his new job on Monday now. He is actually on the payroll as of tomorrow. I wish he could just go in to fill out his insurance papers. This is the last day of old insurance and new one is suppose to start tomorrow, but we haven't filled out any forms yet. What is something big happened this weekend? They would probably say that they don't even know us. I guess we had better be really careful.
Hub and son are at a Texas Rangers ballgame with friend of son and his dad. He loves going and it is better than him being here and yelling at the TV. I actually like baseball; especially when I have a son on the team. But Hub is obsessed. When a ballgame is on, we can't go out to dinner to any restaurant that doesn't have a TV in sight. (Yes, we are classy people!) Anyway, I have the house to myself for 2-3 hours more and that's a rare thing these days. I need to go enjoy it.
Later.
I just got back from seeing "Mama Mia". How fun was that? I may have to buy the CD when it comes out. I think that movie could cheer up anyone. Love Meryl Streep. I want to be her friend. She always seems so real and fun.
Hub will actually start his new job on Monday now. He is actually on the payroll as of tomorrow. I wish he could just go in to fill out his insurance papers. This is the last day of old insurance and new one is suppose to start tomorrow, but we haven't filled out any forms yet. What is something big happened this weekend? They would probably say that they don't even know us. I guess we had better be really careful.
Hub and son are at a Texas Rangers ballgame with friend of son and his dad. He loves going and it is better than him being here and yelling at the TV. I actually like baseball; especially when I have a son on the team. But Hub is obsessed. When a ballgame is on, we can't go out to dinner to any restaurant that doesn't have a TV in sight. (Yes, we are classy people!) Anyway, I have the house to myself for 2-3 hours more and that's a rare thing these days. I need to go enjoy it.
Later.
Monday, July 28, 2008
I've got to rant!!!!
Well, I guess I am a big girl now because I'm going to have my first online rant. Hope this passes a little awareness on to someone out there.....as well as getting it out of my system.
Today I got a forward from a cousin of mine in another state. I love to get mail from her as she seems to get all of the best stuff and she really is so funny herself. She was a teenager when I was born so this is a way to stay connected. But boy did she send the wrong thing to the wrong person. Understand that I'm not mad at her in the least. She would never want to hurt any one's feelings; certainly not mine.
My cousin sent me a forward that was a series of pictures of a new correctional facility in Chicago. The pictures were of a beautiful shiny, glass building, gorgeous landscaping, clean tasteful booths with leather seating, fully decked out weight rooms, etc. There were small white bedrooms with one bed (LINENS!!!) several shelves in it and of course a TV on the wall. The door looked out to sunshine and green grass. It is followed by a series of comparisons of prisoners to working people and why should we work if we could have it so good. People...this may be a place where Martha Stewart, Paris Hilton and other celebrities may spend their time, but this is not the way it is and it irritates me to no end that most people will accept this as fact because who knows any differently.
I'm so sorry that I have seen the other side and I feel I have to share it. My 20 year old son is in prison right now for a case of stupidity. This has changed me, my husband and our 10 year old forever. FOREVER!!! This will always haunt us and even so much more so, my son.
If only all the facilities looked like this one. They can really be a hole. And although you do have 3 meals fixed for you a day, they wake you at 3:45 for breakfast and supper is at 4:30. It may be a peanut butter sandwich and a piece of fruit if you are lucky. The meals are based on the minimum amount of calories acceptable to society and they don't care how you get it. The food you get is cold and you will probably be hungry between meals. Even the guards say the food is not good.
The bedding consists of rubber mattress filled with sand. No pillow. The cell may not be a single, but one big bunk room with 50-60 people sleeping in it. Think of the snoring. Of course, you may not sleep well anyway as you always have to be on your guard. The guards may not help you. Your private toilet may just be a long line of potties close together. No partitions and several men going at the same time. No privacy or pride allowed. If you are in a cell with 1, 3 or 7 other men, then you may get one toilet for the cell, but it will be located less than a foot from your bed. Also the only sink that you have access to is about the size of one on an airplane lav. This is where you brush your teeth, wash you face and use the water to fix a package of Romain noodles if you were allowed to go to the commissary and have the money to buy them. The sink it is located right above the toilet and probably even attached. Pretty appetizing. The grounds coming in are usually very nice with neat flower beds, maybe even a water feature, etc. Always wonder who they are trying to impress.
The family visits at best will be one visit once a week for 2 hours. But they can be once a week for 30 minutes and then through a telephone in a nasty little booth or a glass with a hole in it similar to a movie ticket office. You can't hear anything unless you stand up and put your mouth and then your ear to it. Of course, once you have a line of people on one side of the glass yelling conversation and one on the other side yelling back, no one can hear. The only thing you get is to actually see your loved one and pray that there are no bruises, cuts, etc. It will break your heart seeing little children go see their dads and that is all they get. We have seen daddies cry while holding newborn babies for the first time. We've seen elderly women go to see their almost elderly sons and wonder how long they have visited their child this way. Yet we still go. We all still go.....
These men have all made choices that have got them here. For some, this is the only way they will ever learn and like my son, it probably saved his life. Any longer on his on and he surely would have overdosed. At the same time, we have seen first hand that justice can be handed out in unequal amounts. The men are stripped down until they don't feel like human beings, but more like a dog just picked up from the dogcatcher. At least the humane society protects the dogs. How can they live like that and then set them free and wonder why they don't have any pride, confidence and sometimes morals. A lot end up back there because they feel that is all they deserve.
I have no answers. Our system is supposedly the best in the world and I don't doubt it. But somewhere we are getting off track and not helping our problem or remembering that we are all God's children.
It is just one of those things that I have to get on my soapbox about. I know that it is prison and not the Waldorf. It shouldn't be so pleasant that people are beating the doors down to get in. But haven't we come far enough not to go to the other extreme? Where is the "rehabilitation"? Did you know that there are long lists of inmates waiting for a chance to learn something to better themselves. Only a few make it. There was even a long list to be part of a Bible Study. My son couldn't get into it even though it was being led and supported by his own church. It irritates me that most people do not realize that the pictures are not norm and who knows may even be staged. I'm sure I would accept this as truth if we weren't living this nightmare. You never know until you've been there.
If someone happens to forward these pictures to you, please remember what I have written. And if you are reading this, would you let me know that, too. I would like to think that maybe this mother can make a small difference in compassion.
Later.
Today I got a forward from a cousin of mine in another state. I love to get mail from her as she seems to get all of the best stuff and she really is so funny herself. She was a teenager when I was born so this is a way to stay connected. But boy did she send the wrong thing to the wrong person. Understand that I'm not mad at her in the least. She would never want to hurt any one's feelings; certainly not mine.
My cousin sent me a forward that was a series of pictures of a new correctional facility in Chicago. The pictures were of a beautiful shiny, glass building, gorgeous landscaping, clean tasteful booths with leather seating, fully decked out weight rooms, etc. There were small white bedrooms with one bed (LINENS!!!) several shelves in it and of course a TV on the wall. The door looked out to sunshine and green grass. It is followed by a series of comparisons of prisoners to working people and why should we work if we could have it so good. People...this may be a place where Martha Stewart, Paris Hilton and other celebrities may spend their time, but this is not the way it is and it irritates me to no end that most people will accept this as fact because who knows any differently.
I'm so sorry that I have seen the other side and I feel I have to share it. My 20 year old son is in prison right now for a case of stupidity. This has changed me, my husband and our 10 year old forever. FOREVER!!! This will always haunt us and even so much more so, my son.
If only all the facilities looked like this one. They can really be a hole. And although you do have 3 meals fixed for you a day, they wake you at 3:45 for breakfast and supper is at 4:30. It may be a peanut butter sandwich and a piece of fruit if you are lucky. The meals are based on the minimum amount of calories acceptable to society and they don't care how you get it. The food you get is cold and you will probably be hungry between meals. Even the guards say the food is not good.
The bedding consists of rubber mattress filled with sand. No pillow. The cell may not be a single, but one big bunk room with 50-60 people sleeping in it. Think of the snoring. Of course, you may not sleep well anyway as you always have to be on your guard. The guards may not help you. Your private toilet may just be a long line of potties close together. No partitions and several men going at the same time. No privacy or pride allowed. If you are in a cell with 1, 3 or 7 other men, then you may get one toilet for the cell, but it will be located less than a foot from your bed. Also the only sink that you have access to is about the size of one on an airplane lav. This is where you brush your teeth, wash you face and use the water to fix a package of Romain noodles if you were allowed to go to the commissary and have the money to buy them. The sink it is located right above the toilet and probably even attached. Pretty appetizing. The grounds coming in are usually very nice with neat flower beds, maybe even a water feature, etc. Always wonder who they are trying to impress.
The family visits at best will be one visit once a week for 2 hours. But they can be once a week for 30 minutes and then through a telephone in a nasty little booth or a glass with a hole in it similar to a movie ticket office. You can't hear anything unless you stand up and put your mouth and then your ear to it. Of course, once you have a line of people on one side of the glass yelling conversation and one on the other side yelling back, no one can hear. The only thing you get is to actually see your loved one and pray that there are no bruises, cuts, etc. It will break your heart seeing little children go see their dads and that is all they get. We have seen daddies cry while holding newborn babies for the first time. We've seen elderly women go to see their almost elderly sons and wonder how long they have visited their child this way. Yet we still go. We all still go.....
These men have all made choices that have got them here. For some, this is the only way they will ever learn and like my son, it probably saved his life. Any longer on his on and he surely would have overdosed. At the same time, we have seen first hand that justice can be handed out in unequal amounts. The men are stripped down until they don't feel like human beings, but more like a dog just picked up from the dogcatcher. At least the humane society protects the dogs. How can they live like that and then set them free and wonder why they don't have any pride, confidence and sometimes morals. A lot end up back there because they feel that is all they deserve.
I have no answers. Our system is supposedly the best in the world and I don't doubt it. But somewhere we are getting off track and not helping our problem or remembering that we are all God's children.
It is just one of those things that I have to get on my soapbox about. I know that it is prison and not the Waldorf. It shouldn't be so pleasant that people are beating the doors down to get in. But haven't we come far enough not to go to the other extreme? Where is the "rehabilitation"? Did you know that there are long lists of inmates waiting for a chance to learn something to better themselves. Only a few make it. There was even a long list to be part of a Bible Study. My son couldn't get into it even though it was being led and supported by his own church. It irritates me that most people do not realize that the pictures are not norm and who knows may even be staged. I'm sure I would accept this as truth if we weren't living this nightmare. You never know until you've been there.
If someone happens to forward these pictures to you, please remember what I have written. And if you are reading this, would you let me know that, too. I would like to think that maybe this mother can make a small difference in compassion.
Later.
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