I've got to rant!!!!

Well, I guess I am a big girl now because I'm going to have my first online rant. Hope this passes a little awareness on to someone out there.....as well as getting it out of my system.

Today I got a forward from a cousin of mine in another state. I love to get mail from her as she seems to get all of the best stuff and she really is so funny herself. She was a teenager when I was born so this is a way to stay connected. But boy did she send the wrong thing to the wrong person. Understand that I'm not mad at her in the least. She would never want to hurt any one's feelings; certainly not mine.

My cousin sent me a forward that was a series of pictures of a new correctional facility in Chicago. The pictures were of a beautiful shiny, glass building, gorgeous landscaping, clean tasteful booths with leather seating, fully decked out weight rooms, etc. There were small white bedrooms with one bed (LINENS!!!) several shelves in it and of course a TV on the wall. The door looked out to sunshine and green grass. It is followed by a series of comparisons of prisoners to working people and why should we work if we could have it so good. People...this may be a place where Martha Stewart, Paris Hilton and other celebrities may spend their time, but this is not the way it is and it irritates me to no end that most people will accept this as fact because who knows any differently.

I'm so sorry that I have seen the other side and I feel I have to share it. My 20 year old son is in prison right now for a case of stupidity. This has changed me, my husband and our 10 year old forever. FOREVER!!! This will always haunt us and even so much more so, my son.

If only all the facilities looked like this one. They can really be a hole. And although you do have 3 meals fixed for you a day, they wake you at 3:45 for breakfast and supper is at 4:30. It may be a peanut butter sandwich and a piece of fruit if you are lucky. The meals are based on the minimum amount of calories acceptable to society and they don't care how you get it. The food you get is cold and you will probably be hungry between meals. Even the guards say the food is not good.

The bedding consists of rubber mattress filled with sand. No pillow. The cell may not be a single, but one big bunk room with 50-60 people sleeping in it. Think of the snoring. Of course, you may not sleep well anyway as you always have to be on your guard. The guards may not help you. Your private toilet may just be a long line of potties close together. No partitions and several men going at the same time. No privacy or pride allowed. If you are in a cell with 1, 3 or 7 other men, then you may get one toilet for the cell, but it will be located less than a foot from your bed. Also the only sink that you have access to is about the size of one on an airplane lav. This is where you brush your teeth, wash you face and use the water to fix a package of Romain noodles if you were allowed to go to the commissary and have the money to buy them. The sink it is located right above the toilet and probably even attached. Pretty appetizing. The grounds coming in are usually very nice with neat flower beds, maybe even a water feature, etc. Always wonder who they are trying to impress.

The family visits at best will be one visit once a week for 2 hours. But they can be once a week for 30 minutes and then through a telephone in a nasty little booth or a glass with a hole in it similar to a movie ticket office. You can't hear anything unless you stand up and put your mouth and then your ear to it. Of course, once you have a line of people on one side of the glass yelling conversation and one on the other side yelling back, no one can hear. The only thing you get is to actually see your loved one and pray that there are no bruises, cuts, etc. It will break your heart seeing little children go see their dads and that is all they get. We have seen daddies cry while holding newborn babies for the first time. We've seen elderly women go to see their almost elderly sons and wonder how long they have visited their child this way. Yet we still go. We all still go.....

These men have all made choices that have got them here. For some, this is the only way they will ever learn and like my son, it probably saved his life. Any longer on his on and he surely would have overdosed. At the same time, we have seen first hand that justice can be handed out in unequal amounts. The men are stripped down until they don't feel like human beings, but more like a dog just picked up from the dogcatcher. At least the humane society protects the dogs. How can they live like that and then set them free and wonder why they don't have any pride, confidence and sometimes morals. A lot end up back there because they feel that is all they deserve.

I have no answers. Our system is supposedly the best in the world and I don't doubt it. But somewhere we are getting off track and not helping our problem or remembering that we are all God's children.

It is just one of those things that I have to get on my soapbox about. I know that it is prison and not the Waldorf. It shouldn't be so pleasant that people are beating the doors down to get in. But haven't we come far enough not to go to the other extreme? Where is the "rehabilitation"? Did you know that there are long lists of inmates waiting for a chance to learn something to better themselves. Only a few make it. There was even a long list to be part of a Bible Study. My son couldn't get into it even though it was being led and supported by his own church. It irritates me that most people do not realize that the pictures are not norm and who knows may even be staged. I'm sure I would accept this as truth if we weren't living this nightmare. You never know until you've been there.

If someone happens to forward these pictures to you, please remember what I have written. And if you are reading this, would you let me know that, too. I would like to think that maybe this mother can make a small difference in compassion.

Later.